scary stuff

I would like the new organic market in town to thrive, and--as such--settled for just a half-gallon each of lactose-free milk and o.j. (to be guzzled by Gabe and Jeff respectively.) Maybe the stocking protocol will reach equilibrium if they get off to a good start. In the meantime, will Giant’s facelift--still in the heavily bandaged stages--entice me to partake of its vision of a mainstream grocery store? Seems unlikely I will crest the hill of indifference where Giant is concerned. Indifference, though, could be an improvement.

The roads in and around Washington D.C. were designed, I submit, by sheer accident. They make me feel as if I’m driving through a sleight-of-hand act: In the right lane you think? Presto chango! There is no right lane! (please don’t plow into the parked cars.) Oh, in the left lane now? Alakazam! There’s only one lane, and you and that sheet glass truck next to you are both in it! It’s all pretty wack...and I wonder--as I do with the beltway--how it remains as relatively free of sideswipes and fender-benders at it seems to, and why someone, somewhere along the line didn’t start a successful trend to swath all vehicles in foam rubber. Still, once again, we got in and out with a brief pit stop at the Greenbelt Starbucks to chase away my afternoon groggies, and I was left wondering: Why isn’t Starbucks coffee very good? Tomorrow, it will be the streets of Baltimore we take on--full of jackhammers and lane-impeding delivery trucks--in an attempt to get Gabe from school to his orthodontic appointment on time. So that I can, once again, hear Dr. Tull say “that hygiene is scaring me, man,” while I make a face that attempts to convey how sincere my efforts to lobby for improvement were.

Chapter more-or-less-eight of the book-of-uncomfortably-dubious-value is staring at me, in rough sketch form, from the mottled coffee-paper page of my working notebook, wondering if I would go ahead and inspect it already so I can carry on with the written-out version. “That uncomfortably dubious value is scaring me, man,” I say to it, as I turn instead to see whether Gabe is doing his oral hygiene.